I apologize for this near blunder. I'll tell you what I did manage to fuck up today though. I somehow managed to cause a steady one-hour bleed from my thumbs. I had a run-in with a cuticle-removing tool that did not end well. How do I do these things? Well because I am the clumsiest human alive. I once managed to get a killer bruise on the back of my head from a door knob injury. (I was attacked.) True Story.
Anyway, here is your pickup line for the day:
"Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them."
Zing!
Thank goodness Marie treated me to a London Fog today. It warmed my insides.
I also found this in an old sketchbook. It made me smile. Apparently, I was a comedic genius in High School.
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